How Can I Achieve The Complete and Happy Life I Deserve? Post 1 of the “MyLife TODAY! on Thursdays” series

Being a Baby Boomer who grew up in the 1960’s and early 70’s, I, like the vast majority of my generation, was taught the philosophy that said, “It’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game that’s important. Play hard. Play fair. Play the game.”.

• Fair play;
• Respect;
• Team spirit;
• Give it all you’ve got;
• Do your best;
• Be in the game;
• Have fun; and
• Play to win.

These values were reflected in our lives as well as on the sporting field.

At the end of the day, people could face each aspect of their life knowing that if they did their absolute best and won, then they would receive the glory given to the winner.  And, if they gave it all they could and didn’t win then they can walk away knowing they had done their very best.

Either way, they can walk away an achiever. And that, in a nutshell, was the emphasis of the “How you play the game” philosophy.

Whether you won or not, you were still an achiever, because you gave it all that you could, you did your very best on the day. There was no disgrace in losing, under those circumstances. Disappointment, yes – but not disgrace.

The “How you play the game” philosophy allowed people to have dignity.  It allowed people to participate to the best of their ability, to dig in and with all the effort they could muster – to be an achiever.

Then in the mid to late 1970’s a new philosophy became popular, one that’s still being taught.  A philosophy that took a time-proven idea, goal setting, and turned it into a philosophy which, I believe, actually prevents far too many people from getting what they want in life: the philosophy of Win/Lose – Succeed/Fail.

The philosophy of “Win at all costs.”  The philosophy that says “If you don’t win, you’re a loser. If you don’t succeed, you’re a failure”.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m far too competitive not to want to win. But there is a big difference between wanting and striving and doing all you can to win and winning at all cost. Of seeing a loss as a reason for others to label us as a “loser”.

With this philosophy the fact that I’ve represented my country at the World Championships is overridden by the fact I lost in the semis – ergo, I’m a failure!

I’ve worked with far too many people who’ve strived to achieve things in life, who’ve set goals that haven’t come to fruition and who’ve simply became sick and tired of being compared to “the winners in life”;  of hearing slogans that put them down and demeaned them. Slogans like, “Second place is first loser!”

And in becoming sick and tired they gave up on the one thing that kept them alive – not physically but deep within – their dream. After all what’s the point in even trying when people are just going to call you a loser if you don’t win the race to your dreams?

I see it in the way they act, the way they talk, the way they view their future. So often their self-belief is clouded by the fog of the loser/failure tag which they believe to be true. And it isn’t!

Some of my most fulfilling moments come when my seminars finish and I get to see the light in their eyes, life in their step, self-belief in their minds and an awareness of the unique talents they possess. Ironically, what they end up with is what was there all the time. It just got lost because of a belief. A belief imposed on them by a message that says “if you don’t win, you’re a loser”.

Well, I have news for you!!!

You are an achiever – no matter where you are in life right now. No matter what’s happened in your past. No matter what your circumstances are. No matter what you feel you’ve achieved, or haven’t achieved, so far. No matter how much or how little you possess. No matter how often you’ve tried and in someone’s opinion, even your own, never quite “got there”, wherever that’s supposed to be. No matter what – you are an Achiever!

Now, that’s how I reckon you really play this game called life!

Make Your Dreams A Reality

Colin

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